I've always thought it was ideal to love what you do. Isn't that the advice every career counselor, every Tom, Dick and Oprah, give? Find what you love to do, and then figure out how to make money doing it.
I love to write. How ideal could this be? (Other than getting paid for it, of course). I get to write at home, on my schedule, and still be home full time for my kids and husband. All the things I love most wrapped into one pretty package.
Except there are days I wished I loved writing a little less. And today was one of them.
My daughter's birthday is coming up, and today the grandparents came to take her out and I got a few hours in the afternoon to birthday gift shop. The idea was grand: go to the two stores that have the exact thing I know I want to get, be home in an hour and a half, and have the entire house to myself to write for a few hours. BLISS!
Except the first store didn't have the gift I wanted. Neither did the second. Or the third. Or a fourth. And by the fifth store I was incredibly frustrated because this is the only day I have to shop without my daughter, I have no gift, AND my time to write is slipping away. I felt like a child on the verge of a temper-tantrum standing in front of the shelf where the perfect gift should have been, stamping my foot and saying, "This is really cutting into my writing time! Now I'm going to end up with NONE!"
And how pathetically sad is that? Instead of enjoying the time to shop for something special, I was grumbling that I couldn't get back to work.
So I breathed deep, let it go, and accepted the fact that I wasn't going to get any writing in until the kids were in bed tonight. Goodbye record word day. Hello eeking out whatever I could manage.
I'm not sure that I wrote anything brilliant tonight. I am tired beyond belief. And I come again to the wall of faith: how much should God and Babs faith in him be central to this story? The funny thing is, Babs is dealing with this too. And so in writing I write the way she deals.... a tiny chunk at a time, and when it gets too much the conversation changes or someone walks in. I'm going with it. I hope it will work itself out, cause I really have no idea.
Word count tonight: 1,621